Dealing with Anxiety: Tips from a Psychotherapist

If you're like most people, you've probably experienced anxiety at some point in your life. Maybe it's the nervousness you feel before a big presentation at work, or the worry that creeps in when you're facing a difficult decision. Whatever the cause, anxiety can be a difficult emotion to deal with.

As a psychotherapist, I've worked with many clients who struggle with anxiety. In this post, I'll share some tips that I've found to be helpful for managing anxiety and reducing its impact on your life.

Tip #1: Practice Deep Breathing

When you're feeling anxious, your breathing can become shallow and rapid. This can actually make your anxiety worse. To counteract this, try practicing deep breathing. Sit or lie down in a comfortable position and breathe in slowly through your nose, filling your lungs with air. Hold your breath for a few seconds, then exhale slowly through your mouth. Repeat this for a few minutes until you feel more relaxed.

Tip #2: Challenge Negative Thoughts

Anxiety often stems from negative thoughts and beliefs about ourselves and the world around us. These thoughts can be irrational and unhelpful, but they can also feel very real. One way to deal with them is to challenge them. Ask yourself, "Is this thought really true?" or "Is there any evidence to support this belief?" By questioning these thoughts, you can start to see them in a more objective light and reduce their power over you.

Tip #3: Seek Professional Help

If you're struggling with anxiety and finding it difficult to manage on your own, don't hesitate to seek professional help. A qualified psychotherapist can work with you to develop coping strategies and help you address the root causes of your anxiety. Don't be afraid to reach out for help - it's a sign of strength, not weakness.

I hope these tips are helpful for managing anxiety. Remember, it's okay to struggle with anxiety, and it's important to take care of your mental health. If you have any questions or would like to schedule a session with me, please don't hesitate to contact me.

Transpersonal Psychotherapy for Men Seeking Positive Change

Psychotherapy is a form of treatment that helps individuals understand and work through their emotions, behaviors, and thoughts. It can be particularly beneficial for men, who may be socialized to suppress their emotions and avoid seeking help for mental health issues.

From a transpersonal lens, psychotherapy can help men connect with their deeper selves and find meaning and purpose in their lives. This type of therapy views the individual as more than just their thoughts and emotions, and recognizes the interconnectedness of the mind, body, and spirit.

In a transpersonal psychotherapy session, men may be guided to explore their spiritual beliefs and experiences, as well as their sense of identity and personal growth. This can help men tap into their inner wisdom and cultivate self-awareness, self-compassion, and a greater sense of connection to something greater than themselves.

The benefits of psychotherapy for men from a transpersonal perspective are numerous. It can help men cope with stress, anxiety, and depression, and improve their overall mental health and well-being. It can also help men build stronger relationships with others by improving communication and conflict resolution skills.

Furthermore, transpersonal psychotherapy can help men find a sense of purpose and meaning in their lives, leading to increased happiness and fulfillment. It can also help men develop a greater sense of self-acceptance and self-love, which can lead to improved self-esteem and confidence.

In conclusion, psychotherapy from a transpersonal lens can be a powerful tool for men to improve their mental health and overall well-being. It helps men connect with their deeper selves, find meaning and purpose, and build stronger relationships with others. If you're a man struggling with mental health issues or simply looking to improve your well-being, Contact Me today to talk about booking a session.

Now booking sessions for Individual and Couple's Therapy Throughout the San Francisco Bay Area and Northern California.

Looking For Individual Or Couple’s Counseling?

I am currently accepting telehealth clients for individual, couple’s, and family therapy. Please reach out through phone, text, or email to set up a time for a free, 10-15 minute, consultation to see if we would be a good fit for working together. I am working with client’s throughout California with Northern California being my homebase. Check out my profile on PsychologyToday.com

-James Pritchett, LMFT

Looking for EMDR in Grass Valley?

First of all, EMDR, what’s that? In the most basic sense, EMDR is a tool, much like a paintbrush or a screwdriver. More importantly, it is how the tool is used and for what purpose. EMDR is a therapeutic tool used for processing trauma. EMDR stands for Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing, quite the mouthful. The technique is used alongside psychotherapy and has shown, through evidence based research, to be an effective and efficient tool for processing trauma.

Yeah, but what is EMDR?

Well, not all EMDR has to involve eye movement, or a person waving their hand in the air. What the eye movement is working to accomplish is what we call “alternating bi-lateral stimulation.” This serves multiple purposes. By providing a stimulation through eye movement, headphones, or vibrating paddles, the person receiving the treatment is kept in the here-and-now as memories are triggered and brought into the present moment. In addition to providing a grounding, present moment centered awareness, the bi-lateral aspect of the stimulation serves to shake the trauma loose, kind of like getting that last bit of ketchup out of the bottle. Researchers have discovered that trauma can get trapped in the body and get stuck, or frozen The alternating bi-lateral stimulation targets these areas and thaws, or softens them, so that they can be released.

That sounds like it might be painful…

The most painful part of the trauma is going through it. Once a person is ready to process the trauma, the hardest part is over. Using a tool like EMDR to complete the processing of an unprocessed memory releases the pain that has been carried since the initial trauma was experienced. With the processing work may come catharsis and can trigger painful memories, but the point of the work is to release the pain and re-program the memory with what it needs to feel complete. EMDR is a multi-phase process that takes time to establish readiness for. The actual process of moving your eyes, listening to sounds, or holding the paddles doesn’t take very long. There is work that has to take place before and after the EMDR session to set up the session and to close the work.

So, how long does it take?

Well, it depends. It depends on the type and kind of trauma that we are going to try and process. You may have heard of “Big T” trauma and “Little t” trauma. You may have also heard of “single incident trauma.” Depending on the severity of the experience, and how many memories are attached to the target memory, it can happen in as few as 5 or 6 sessions. It also depends on what else is going on in your life. Depending on the current life stressors, sometimes a therapy session might focus on a negative experience or a fight with a partner that took place over the last few days. No matter what the situation, we will go at your pace. We will certainly set an intention to do this work as quickly as possible, but without need to create a rush or any additional sense of urgency.

Reach out for more information on EMDR in Grass Valley and Nevada City. Let’s start the conversation today and talk more about how this work could be helpful to you.

Every Relationship has Challenges

What’s wrong with me? Am I bad at relationships?

It is easy to let negative self-talk get in the way of the truth. The fact of that matter is that relationships are hard. It is also important to consider that rarely are we good at everything without any practice or coaching. We don’t have to go through life and the challenges that we encounter alone. Through connection to other people, community, and loved ones, the stressors that come up in life are more easily faced. These days and ages, it is easy to see the online world of another person and think, “what did they do that I didn’t to get there?” or “why is their life so much better than mine?” I’m sure there are a million other questions we can ask ourselves that all have a similar tone and theme, that there is something wrong with me or with my relationship. I find that it is all too easy to drown ourselves in negative self-talk, defeating ourselves rather than the issue at hand. Within our relationships to others, especially our lovers, these voices can be particularly loud.

How do I fix my relationship?

Wanting to “figure it out", or “fix it” is not an uncommon place to start. Knowing what to do next is where the hard part comes in. But, think of this, you’re here, you’re reading this, so that tells me that you’re trying. That tells me that you are reaching out for support. Getting support for how we show up in relationship is a totally natural thing to do. As a species, from day 1, we begin to imitate the other people in our lives. We learn by watching, listening, and practicing that which we see other people do. When we want to learn something new, we go find other people that can help us learn.

That’s where couple’s therapy can be incredibly helpful. Each of us are born with unique talents and skills that naturally develop. Unfortunately, that doesn’t mean we are always going to be well equipped to face the challenges that come up when we get into relationship. Empathy is a great example of this. Some people are naturally empathic and others need some help to learn. Healthy communication styles and patterns can have a huge impact on the well-being of a relationship. Sometimes, the patterns we observed and absorbed when we were younger lose their effectiveness and it is time to learn something to replace it.

Let’s Start Solution Focused and Skill Based Couple’s Counseling in Grass Valley Together

Couple’s counseling doesn’t have to signal the end of anything negative. Rather it is a forum for old patterns and practices that no longer serve the relationship to be released. Couple’s counseling doesn’t have to involve digging up the past and going eye for an eye with issues. The best part about therapy is that we get to make it what you want, and set goals together. We can take a practical, solution focused approach to learning effective and efficient tools and skills for your relationship. Often what couples need most are new tools and skills in the here-and-now. Together we can re-establish the bond and commitment that you made with each other. Together we can sow the seeds for a healthy and happy future together. Together, we can heal. Email or Call me today to get this conversation started.

What Does it Mean to Ask For Help?

Asking For Help Can Be Hard

It doesn’t matter what it’s about, sometimes I have a lot of difficulty asking for help. Maybe it has to do with the fact that I was raised with the messages “be tough" and “be a man,” maybe it has to do with my quest for self-reliance and independence. Maybe, just maybe, I was born this way. It just might be the case that I will have ample opportunity to practice asking for help in a variety of contexts and situations for the rest of my life. Maybe I’m looking at this through a lens that has nothing to do with that it is hard for me to ask for help, rather it is hard for me to accept it.

Or Sometimes Is It Accepting the Help that is Hard?

Accepting and asking are inherently two different things. One has an inwardly directed energy and one has an external energy. What does it mean to open myself up to receive energy, in this instance help, from an outside source? At first glance, I have to put myself in a vulnerable position to be able to receive. I have to accept that I can’t do it alone. The risk my brain wants to convince me of is that I am inadequate, not enough, or unable to do something on my own. These are difficult narratives and stories to overcome. The trick that I like to use when moments like this arise is to ask myself what happens when I flip the script, turn the narrative around, and ask myself, “What do I have to gain from this situation? How can asking for help be a positive?”

An easy metaphor for this situation is thinking about having to go to the doctor for a broken limb. If I were to break my arm, I would need help to re-set the bone, stabilize the injury, and position things so that healing could happen most efficiently. This is an example I like to turn to when I am faced with the difficulty it takes to ask for help. I also take time to let myself feel into the experience of receiving help from a more skilled/trained person. It could also be though of taking music lessons when we want to learn how to play an instrument. It isn’t necessarily that we can’t figure it out on our own, it just might be that we get to more exciting places faster by getting help from a pro.

Support through counseling is within your reach.

When I think of asking for and receiving help with terms like this, I am much more able to do each of these things. My anxiety, worry, or insecurity shrinks. More often than not, asking for some help can lead to some powerful, catalyzing changes. Reach out and ask for help today. I wonder what will happen.

Where do I start?

Feeling stuck?

It can be easy to feel stuck. Sometimes life gives us those lemons that we all hear people talking about. What happens when that happens and we don’t have enough of the other stuff and can only make lemon juice? How do we get to where we can make the lemon-aid?

Well, all it takes is a container, some water, and some sugar. The container is the space. The space is the place where the work takes place, where the magic happens and the ingredients get to blend into something new. The water is you. Humans are composed of 70% water, as it turns out, we seem to have plenty of this around. So, that leaves us with needing some sugar.

Making life sweet again.

Sugar. We all know that sugar is sweet. So, what is the sweet element that is missing here. Well, the sweetness that is missing is something we all could serve to do some more of, self-care. It’s going to take you choosing to do something for yourself. It’s going to take you doing something sweet for yourself to get this party started. Committing to yourself, committing to your growth, your healing and your process is all we need for the sweetness.

I’m here to hold space for your Growth and Healing

What I can offer is the space. My job is to be the container for this work, whether you are in Nevada County or beyond. Your job is to make the first move by calling or emailing me today. Together we can work together to squeeze those lemons and turn them into the something that can quench your soul.

You Can’t Do Someone Else’s Work for Them.

When it comes to life, growth and healing can only happen from the inside-out.  One on hand, this can seem like an unfortunate truth that we can’t do someone else’s work for them.  After all, there are so many aspects of life where we can, like filling up our partner’s gas tank, or doing their laundry.  But, when it comes to our spiritual and personal growth work, that work can be supported by a qualified person, but can’t be done by anyone but you.

Change comes from within. 

One of the more fascinating things about life is that what we experience on the outside is a reflection of what we experience on the inside.  Sometimes these things are extremely hard for us to understand without having to project them onto some sort of external reality.  This creates some distance, both literally and figuratively, between us and thing that we needed some help with understanding.  This can happen both with regards to the positive and the negative.  This effect is something that we have little control over, but thankfully, we are not out-of-control of everything.

So what can we do about it?

Although we cannot take control of what we project onto others, we can take control of our awareness of it.  Most of the time, our projections happen from our sub-conscious, they get sent out from a place that is hard to be attuned to and aware of.  I believe that a person is able to train their awareness, like strengthening a muscle.  I believe that a person can actually notice that what they are experiencing with regards to the external world is actually a part of their own self that is wanting attention, wanting to be seen.  Sometimes this is actually the only way for us to be able to see those parts of ourselves that linger in the shadows.  Sometimes that work is what is needed to be able to fully integrate the parts of ourselves that didn’t get the attention they wanted or deserved when we were younger.

Interested in learning more about yourself?  Contact James today for a free consultation to see how we can work together!

How Does Healing Happen?

Here’s a hint: You already have what it takes.

Something that has always been an open area of inquiry for me has to do with what the mechanisms behind healing, transformation and growth are.  Growing up, I was fascinated with taking things apart, I craved wanting to know how things worked.  There was a belief I held that told me that if I understood how something worked, then I would know how to fix it if it were to break.  This curiosity would seep into every aspect of my being, from taking apart my childhood toys, to electric guitars, and even cars.  For a long time I was primarily interested in things that were physical in nature, things that I could take apart and actually see how they worked.  For me, it was much easier to comprehend how things worked and how to fix them if I was able to see the individual parts that made them up.  Eventually, I would gain a confidence that I could expand my curiosity, and my search for understanding into realms that weren’t always able to be perceived by the naked eye.

Moving into this more abstract world, I begin to rely on making metaphor and drawing similarities between two different systems.  Learning how to relate phenomena from one system and applying it to another allowed for me to grasp new understandings.  It also taught me a valuable skill that I never would have imagined.  Most importantly, I learned that I can different pieces of knowledge, combine them in a new way, and create a new understanding about something I never understood before.  I learned that I can create new tools and new ways of thinking about the world that are applied to things that I can’t see with my naked eye.  I learned that I can do this and learn how to heal.  I also learned that it’s OK to ask for help.  I could do the work faster and more efficiently if I were to get the support I needed to grow.  That support would come by way of teachers, friends, and most of all healers.

What Is Trauma-Informed Therapy?

Trauma Informed Therapy Can Be Such a Useful Tool In Self-Healing

This is because we all have trauma. A trauma informed therapy practice can help uncover the underlying stories that keep us stuck to help aid in radical self-transformation.

And we can undo that trauma to free ourselves into our story more powerfully. Being trauma informed doesn’t have to mean that each person needs to have experienced trauma in their lifetime. In fact, what being Trauma Informed has more to do with me than it does with you.

Being trauma informed is a way for me to say to you that I am focused on creating the safest environment possible for a person to do their healing in. Beyond the standard norms of what any therapist can provide, I value the subtle nuances that can show up in the therapeutic space. Sometimes these are tangible, physical things, like what’s on the walls. Other times, this shows up through the way that I respond to you. Through a commitment to mindfulness in my questions, my responses, and my cultural awareness, I am dedicated to doing everything I can to create safe space. Each of these elements are crucial in creating a therapeutic relationship where you get to feel held and supported in your most sensitive of healing moments.

Are you are interested in learning more about trauma informed therapy?

Therapy With James utilizes a trauma informed therapy modality to help people find power in their stories and reclaim their independence and happiness. Schedule a therapy appointment today to find out.

What is Therapy?

What Is Therapy All About?

From a historical perspective, the field of psychotherapy is just beginning to get out of the dark ages.  There have been some notable figureheads during this time, but things are still very new.  Because of this, there are a variety of opinions on the subject, with lots of room still left to carve out.

What Is The Purpose Of Therapy?

One thing’s for sure, everyone that has become part of the field has the same idea and goal in mind, to help people heal.  In the most simple form, this is the purpose of psychotherapy, to assist someone in getting to a place of joy and contentment in life. 

We All Have Needs

The way that healing happens is unique to every individual.  First and foremost, it takes having an awareness of needs and an ability to respond to them.  Each person has their own set of things that they need in life.  However, there are some needs that are universal, such as a need for connection.

Healing Through Connection

Healing takes place through meeting this need.  Without connection none of this is possible.  With it, everything is.  Through connection there are no limits to what is possible.  The stories we have told ourselves, even the ones that have felt impossible to bear are able to change with the right support.

It’s Okay To Ask For Help

Getting the right support at the right time is critical for speedy recovery.  We all go to the doctor to fix a broken arm, where do we go to fix a broken soul?  How do we mend our wounds that are much less visible?  Who can we turn to when the damage is prevalent yet hard to define?  The answer lies in therapy.  It’s OK to ask for help, it’s OK to reach out for support.  It’s OK to not know what that means or looks like right now.  That’s what we’re here for, too.  Reach out today and schedule a free therapy consultation to see how we can work together to meet your needs and heal your wounds.